I was doing really great last week. I went and got fitted for running shoes and I was able to get lots of exercise in. When I got back from the gym on Thursday night I started thinking about a fitness challenge I could post on my blog. I went to bed excited to get started on it in the morning.
On Friday morning after I dropped my older son off at school I heard the news of the Sandy Hook school shooting. Sandy Hook, my hometown. I was in shock. This was only 20 minutes away from where I live now, a place where I have so many good childhood memories. I spent the day pretty much glued to my tv and facebook. I had to keep sending friends messages that were a mixture of, “Thank God they’re okay.” and “I’m so sorry for your loss.”
It was a tough day and it is still tough. I have lost all my motivation, I haven’t been running and my house is in disarray. The shooting is always in the back of my mind, I feel sad and angry. I wrote a post about growing up in Newtown and a bunch of the great memories I had, that seemed to help. Writing this is helping, too.
It was hard to drop my son off at school this morning. I gave him a big hug and a big kiss and I am counting down the minutes until he comes home (about 23 more.) I know we will all get through this, it’s just a matter of time and healing. Things will be different but, I know I won’t feel sad and angry forever.